Imperfection

The essence of being human is that one does not seek perfection, that one is sometimes willing to commit sins for the sake of loyalty, that one does not push asceticism to the point where it makes friendly intercourse impossible, and that one is prepared in the end to be defeated and broken up by life, which is the inevitable price of fastening one’s love upon other human individuals.

When you strive to be ‘perfect’, you enter an Anti-Life mode. You end up not really living but fulfilling some imaginary barometer of virtue, of thought, or other Human measuring stick.

Life...

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Rules Of Engagement

This a culmination of what I've experienced and what I've observed over the years.

When it comes to casual dating & dating to settle down for marriage, two games spring to mind. Chess & checkers.

An analogy can be drawn between dating & the Chess vs Checkers argument with casual dating being checkers and courtship being chess.While the two games have some similarities, the intricate nature of each gives them some distinct variations in style of play.

Firstly the games; Checkers is all about getting all you can get.The object of checkers is to be the last one with game pieces remaining on the board.A player wins by removing all of his opponent's pieces from the board or by blocking the opponent so that they do not have anymore moves.

Both games require a strategy that maximizes a player's ability to capture their opponents pieces without first losing their own.However, checkers is  a little more random and overall it's all about maximizing all that you can get.

While there are some similarities to its checker's counterpart, Chess distinguishes itself as a more intricate game on many levels.One mind is pitted against another in a game of strategy, foresight and tactical planning. 
While checkers is primarily played in the moment, chess requires a complex strategy that is often won by thinking ahead.Unlike checkers,in order to win you need to put the opponent's king in a position where it cannot escape (checkmate), or is captured.

We could say checkers is a game for the thrill whereas chess is a thinking man's game.

From a dating perspective,Women start with checkers to see what they can get, then move to Chess to see what they can keep (checkmate).In their late teens & early twenties women date casually for the thrill of youth.The objective is to bag as many high rollers as possible (Checkers).

They don't look for stability or direction, they just want to revel in the spirit of youth.

Not to say there's  anything wrong with this as their male contemporaries are probably drowning in debauchery.

During these years it's the players and older men with money to burn (some of them married) that get the most attention.Their male contemporaries are still building their futures in school and surviving on pocket money so they are deemed inept.They basically don't have any thrill value.(Broke & immature)

Between 24 and 27 instinct kicks in and naturally women start to look for stability as they soon realise that the high rolling guys who just wanted to have fun aren't really husband material .You can never really tie down a high roller plus some were even married and just playing them as side chicks.

The law of the jungle comes to play where only the fittest survive.The easiest prey hence becomes their male contemporaries who haven't really got a whiff of life as a high roller.They are fresh out of college and are only starting to build their careers. Vulnerability & inexperience  makes them easy prey.

With few responsibilities and increasing income the young men are perfect targets for cuffing .

I'm not discounting the existence of true love but knowing that a leopard can never change it's spots,all the years of debauchery never really subside.On the surface you see a lady but most times she may be playing  the thinking game of chess for a mate.

Chess being a game of strategy means you have to constantly hide your intentions, sacrifice a few pieces and think a few moves ahead of your opponent so you can mate them.

These are sacrifices that are made in order to win the game not because you love your opponent but just to win.

The courtship turns into a ruse were the only objective is to get hitched.

One fact is that women will get married for all the wrong reasons besides love.As a man you've only succeeded when you've married someone because there is true love. Anything else is just a poor second best and is a recipe for a failed marriage.

Most people will tell you that their lives were much much better before they settled down to get married.These are the same people you find cheating, sneaking around clubs and fishing for diseases yet they have lovely wives at home.

So since you will be older much longer than you'll be young it's imperative that key decisions like  marriage do not plunge you into eternal misery.

A better chess player will generally be thinking throughout the course of a game. 


As a man be a Chess-master ..and be able to play both games simultaneously.That way you will effortlessly mirror a woman's modus-operandi as one would toy with a novice at chess, and of course, expose her as the unfaithful wife or girlfriend that she pretends not to be.Mirror her actions and always be a step ahead.

If she wants to be treated like a lady,she has to be one mentally and behaviorally.

Smart men will play checkers with one hand and Chess with the other.

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Growing Pains

Plenty goes down during your late teenage years. There are decisions to be made, first experiences to be had, the consequences of either could dictate the rest of your life. These years of angst, naivety, and unpredictability can provide our most captivating or most embarrassing stories.

Just stumbled upon this statement and after the second read it had me thinking introspectively.
So here I am at 5 in the morning dialing into those old memories of my late teens.

My teenage years can easily be compared to a classic Man Utd match.Pretty laid back and boring for the 1st 90 minutes then turning into a goal festival at the very death of things.

Nineteen to be precise.I acquired a shit load of life experiences in one crazy year.

I got my 1st job and learnt a lot about people and responsibility which I then threw out the window the moment I stepped into university.19 was  like a crucible.It burnt but then I emerged a man.I guess u gotta take the good with the bad.

I remember when I left for university in Bulawayo my Mom actually packed my bags.I was so spoilt & sheltered that I had little influence on things like that including the actual process of applying for a university place.What can I say, I was an ignorant fool.

Buluwayo was the beginning of a crazy journey.In that year I found my indepenence..discovered alcohol. Partied a lot.Went on dates with what was at that time, the prettiest chick I had ever laid my eyes on.

I wasn't out of control or anything but I was an observer as well as a participant in this.
My style evolved and I settled on my own dress code.The foundation for who I am and what I value was laid there.

I made a lot of mistakes which I have duly learnt from.I made friends with people I realize were not really important.Got heart broken and learnt a lot from that.

However it also proved to be a tragic year as its the year that I lost my Mother.I can never fully understand how so much good and bad things happened in a single year.

Overnight I was thrust from being a raving adolescent to a grown up.It was painful and difficult because nothing in your past can ever prepare you for the loss of a parent.

I lost all my ability to function.I lost my bearings, and nothing made sense.Just writing this sinks my heart to its very depths and it's forbidden territory that I seldom tread.

That year alone shaped who I am today.In retrospect I can only conclude it was God's perfect plan, for I couldn't be the Man I am without having come the way I came.

Experience is the only thing that can be appreciated in Hindsight and like a good wine I've gotten wiser and more refined with time.

I guess in the path of every great man there has to be tragedy, mistakes and a lot of thrill to invoke greatness.

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S.A.F

Time and time again Ferguson has made big, courageous decisions. Some of them backfired. But the point is that, while most clubs tend to be conservative, Sir Alex has been bold.

Playing safe would have been the easy thing for him to do all these years. It's what many managers do -- you take it one step at a time and opt for risk aversion rather than rolling the dice. Ferguson has gone down a different path.

But the fact is that Sir Alex is still successful in his fourth decade at Old Trafford because, more than most, he's been willing to put his reputation on the line with the kind of major decisions some of his colleagues prefer not to make.

----Gabriele Marcotti

Personally I believe this is the blueprint for long-term success that transcends time.Having the balls to do what has never been done, the conviction to make a decision that defies logic or reason.It is people like this who will be etched in History for eternity.

These are the people that inspire me daily.

It is said:

“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the understanding that something else is more important than fear. The brave may not live forever, but the cautious do not live at all. ”

 “From now on you'll be traveling the road between who you think you are and who you can be. The key is to allow yourself to make the journey.”